hi!

i just want to say that i caught ultraviolet today. and let's just say. don't go and watch it cause it isn't nice. i'll rate it 1/5 cause 1/2 goes to her pretty face, and the other 1/2 goes to the random scenes with violet and six. which was so sad.

yea. basically. the movie sucked la. wasted my 4 bucks. i couldn't get half the plot. and the storyline is thin. and it's so animated. everything is so graphical.

anyhoo. i saw graciee today!! hahahahahahaha..

know what? since ultra ended so early, gar and i walked round suntec aimlessly. and then to marina, and then to raffles city. mean while, i checked out on all the choc box's outlets. and although i knew they closed, i just wanted to triple check. and sigh.. it's gone, really. i miss them so so much. irene, brenz, VIKKI!!, sofi, yana, angie and of course farah.

BAH EMO.

and oh, i walked in some CD shop (i was in my uni) and this weird lady started to play the CSS song can! so im like. righttt...

and omg. i should've watched ice age instead!?!? omg. i swear ultraviolet isn't nice. bah. i can't get over that fact!

OK.

anyway i went for the holy ghost meet. and it's kinda freaky when people started to laugh, but after a while, it got kinda nice cause it made me melt to see people laughing ever so merrily. =)

they looked so happy.


my hair seems to be dropping?! anyway im growing it. and then i want to soft curl my hair when it's long. and if i look funny. i'll just get it cut again. =)

anyway im tired. can't wait for CSS grand final! =)

my brother is interested in having a sushi buffet with me! he is deciding on the price now. ooo!
and i begged naz to get the cell to have sushi buffet during the hols. =) i wish they'd just organise another ECP trip like last year, it was SO SO FUN.

<3s!

wanted to post up something. but the html was screwed up. LAZY.

Dear,
I am the Bill and Exchange(assistant) Manager of the Africa development Bank,
MRS AJAHA AHMED.
In my department I discovered an abandoned sum of USD$11.300.000 (ELEVEN MILLION THREE HUNDERS U.S.A DOLLARS).

laugh please. i found that im my inbox. lol. i'll be a rich tai tai already man.

anyways! how screwed can Eng Wah be. all the timings for the shows are like outrageous.
can't watch all the good shows. damnit. so i'm probably catching ultraviolet, which seems darn stupid cause the storyline seems matrix. which i don't like.

anyway random

took this on sunday. with my phone again! im wasting my mms!

anywho. we have a change of seats in class and like it's so weird now that i've got a prefect sitting next to me. so it's kinda weird if i sneak food into my mouth cause i know she's a prefect and i'll get her into trouble. bah. but she's cool la. she pretends not to see. =)

and ruifen's chinese is *faints* super good. and her handwriting is nice too!

so yea, it isn't as bad as i thought. just that poor jing wen is always alone cause she and gaya don't really communicate that much. lol.

im quite surprise that my mum allows me to go for holy ghost cause previously she banned me from going and all. but yea i sort of prayed about it and then tada. suddenly she came up to me yesterday and asked if i want a ride down to church. and im like OOO. ok. looks like she forgot that she banned me. =) but lol. you know who to thank.

so anyways! everyone. i want to rant about wednesdays. how busy it gets that we only get this much rest (pinches fingers). and yes. but yesterday was different. cause mdm wahidah didn't come. and we had a period off bio cause of teresa!!! yes! so yea buy friday's strait times and turn over to the life section. and tada. =)

haha. 5.2 is the chosen class cause we're her loyal supporters. - supposedly.

=)

and i wanted to do my homework? but i can't find any of them. lol. so i just did my english tuition hw. and watched TV.

ahh. sushi buffet.
i'm craving for sushi!!! are you?

my holiday is cancelled. cause of some reason. and i shall not elaborate cause im so frustrated. cause some one had to add salt to the wound. sheesh. i knew something like that would happen. my intuition works most of the time. i should always trust my intuition from now on.

and the drilling started again. noise, all that noise, noise in school noise at home. i hate KC really. all the sec twos. all the outrageous rules that even the prefects don't follow.

anyway, at least i can make it for church camp. hope i can go. =) and school's crap. assembly was useless, all the prefects in my school? half of them don't make any sense.

im an angry person, eek.
ok tuition now.
thats all.

stop blogging pamela stop blogging.

it's going to be the END OF MARCH ALREADY. and what have i done that's rather constructive? oh, let me see. nothing much, really.
i better pull up my belt, socks, glasses, bag and whatever nots. to become a nerd. cause mid-year is like what? a month away?

and im going on a holiday!!!! to somewhere. =)) for TEN DAYS! WOW! it's just me and my parents. to say it nicely it's called bonding in someplace elsewhere. and it's 90% confirmed cause my parent's paid the deposit already. i hope nothing crops up and affect my holiday cause i'll be so mad.

=)

ok time to study. it's going to be april already!! and im saving up my money to pay it back to him/her. teehee.
and buying birthday gifts of course. cause it's gonna be my last year in KC anyway. it better be my last year. KC is getting so out-of-hand. i rather leave KC now. then spend a minute longer in it.

which means i have to study. so tada!

YES! that's adriano if you were wondering. some of the CSS contestants came to our school's family day. =) namely adriano, yi yuan, yin wei, renfred, zhi yang, geraldine and of course teresa.

anyways! yi yuan (if i got his name right) is very, nice! they're very down-to-earth sort of people. anyways that picture above is taken when adriano was in the car. took it with my phone, thought it was clear. =)

and we all ran like crazy fans. and haha, it was just plain hilarious. hahahaha.

today's sermon was fruitful. i think i've been loving the worship songs more then i love God. something to ponder on huh.

and my cell, half the guys are learning guitar! im learning too, in a way. borrowing my brother's guitar to learn, and taking the chords from the internet. and although i've no interest in any musical instruments. but learning wont hurt.

-
and my mum, gosh. she can't stop comparing to my 'aunty' (she's a year younger, but relative wise she's my aunty.) cause she's in a triple science class, and my mum says that pl (which is her) studys like mad everyday and her school gives her tons of work to do. like wth? and i reckon pl has like cca points to help her deduct some points off her o levels anyway.

grr, and my mum is comparing me with all the other people whose taking their o's ie. my relatives la.

sigh. and my maths is going downhill. my chinese is going i don't know where.

but know what? nevermind. i'll go study. =))
i'll go do as what graciee told me too.
and i'll pray cause i know that God is there.

i did an angry entry a week ago. and didn't post it up. i might one day. but i reckon not cause it'll probably offend a lot of people. and those were just angry words. maybe i felt neglected. maybe not.

thats all. cheers to the week ahead. no com for me again!

WHO WANTS TO TEACH ME GUITAR? i want someone with lots of patience cause im rather slow and busy and i always take my own sweet time to learn. and i can't travel. and you have to be a girl. or else my mum will !@#$%^&.

ok im kidding. who wants to teach?

maybe after my o's. =)

________________________________________

Get to know yourself better

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes. (LOL!! i shall say that im a very shallow minded person on the outside. go figure.)

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with? ( i do not flirt!! and i bet no one finds it interesting to see pamela flirt. like lol.)

Your views on education

Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own. (yes i want to earn money, lots of it. but i don't mind education. =))

The right job for you:

You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy. (yea, which pays me generously too!)

How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying. (HAHA is all i can say)

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel. ( this is sooo true. )

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long. (i think it's true too.)

get this on : http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

got it from phina's page.

'cause all you are, is all i want, always.
draw me close in your arms.
oh God, i wanna be with you...

lol. guess what i found in my hi5 account's inbox?

from some random person.

My beloved is my variety of warbler in my heart and spiritual and mental forever.

and lol. i have no idea what that means. so will some one enlighten me?
anyways! family day's tomorrow. im in-charge of the candy floss machine. =) haha! i guess thats the perks of having a family day. i can try out the candy floss machine, for free.

i feel a sense of achievement for this week, cause i did not use the computer from sunday till friday. exception of tuesday of course. and that's weird cause i feel weird staring at the computer but i know i can't use it cause of my own pact to myself. and lol. i did not remove the account cause i didn't want to. hmp.

met up with graciee today. and yes, i skipped cca again. sigh. i see no point in going anyway. shall not digress further.

met grace, and went up to questnet. which is a company she works for, indirectly, or directly. im not really sure. and then we went to starbucks to talk about stuffs. =)) it helped me a great deal. cause i can relate to her methods and all. and then we talked about the company's dealings and all. im quite interested, but obviously i can't commit. not now anyway. after my o's. =))))

i love fridays, cause i can meet up with my friends whom i don't see often. and they never fail to surprise me with something or other. ie. graciee's change in character. LOL.

i'm getting used to life in sec5. enjoying almost every minute of it for sure, and i know i'll miss it all. =))

but c'mon everyone has got to move on. so, let it go. all the pain and sadness. let it go, and keep all the happiness. haha.

im so random sometimes. i don't even get myself.

anyway! teresa did our school proud by coming out top for the girls segment in campus superstar. and which means i will be going for that finals thing on the 2nd of april. im so proud of her!! aren't you? she's really sweet!

and random people can shout GO KC to you (when i was in my uniform) and you'll know it's cause of teresa. =) she's singing on family day too!

VOTE FOR HER!! alright?

this is a pretty old song sung by don moen. and i guess it pretty much summarised all that i have to say. =)

Lord You seem so far away
A million miles or more it feels today
And though I haven't lost my faith
I must confess right now
That it's hard for me to pray
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give the grace
With all that's in my heart

Chorus:
I will sing I will praise
Even in my darkest hour
Through the sorrow and the pain
I will sing I will praise
Lift my hands to honor You
Because Your Word is true
I will sing

Lord it's hard for me to see
All the thoughts and plans You have for me
But I will put my trust in You
Knowing that You died to set me free
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give grace
With all that's in my heart

i will sing- don moen.

after o's im gonna join a ministry. well, bro sam enlightened me to some extend. =)

haven't decided on a certain ministry yet. but have my eye on one.

term two starts tomorrow. lol.

and i bought a pair of new slippers today? and i've got SO many pictures to blog about. eg, the ice cream thing with irene and jenn. but lol, no time.

gonna remove the account soon. will be back online now and then.

till then, God bless. =)

how come you ''feel'' and i don't?

go figure.

sigh sigh sigh. i think, i need to withdraw from computer usage already. i keep saying that but take no actions.

so! i shall do something sacrificial. i will remove my account from this computer, hence, i won't use that often cause it's gonna be a hassle to hack into the whole thing to get my account back and ya-dah.

and, i think i better cut down on my television. sigh, whats the point in all this if i don't practise self-discipline right?

and, i realise i've been slacking this year, slacking so bad that i rely on my tutors so much that i don't do anything. literally. so yea, thats partly why i don't want tutors.

and, i'm gonna do self-reflection/ quiet time everyday so i'll keep myself in focus.

moreover, i can't wait for friday, graciee is gonna help me plan out my stuffs and nonsense. and i don't know.

so yea, will be removing the account tomorrow when my dad leaves singapore. hmm, and yea. so i'll be taking a temporary hiatus from blogging. =)

till then, keep my tag-board alive. lol. and this blog won't be dead. cause you know i'll still find ways to update it. lol. i'm like computer/blog addict already. can't stand that fact.

oh wells, studying studying here i come. =(

oh chinese, here i come too. SIGH.

when i take blogging off my list of addictions, i hope to take off day-dreaming too. and other things. i've kinda decided what i will do if whatever shit happens. and yea, i will get my priorities right this time =) i know i can.
thats all.

in GOD we trust.

pacer wrote this. love this song.

Humble Worship

Verse 1

Let me be the one to worship, to worship at your feet
Let me be the one to love you, it’s you that I seek
Let me be the one to understand how to please you first, please you first

Verse 2

Let him be the one to mould you, to mould you in his way
Let him be the one to hold you, to hold you day by day
Let him be the one to pour out, his spirit on you
His spirit on you

Chorus

I want to be a humble worshipper for you
Just let me humbly come and worship you
I want to be a humble worshipper for you
A humble worship for you

Back To Verse 1 and 2 then chorus

Verse 3

Pour out your spirit
Father, we are ready
Come now in all your glory
As we bow down to you our king
May this song that we now sing
Please you and you alone

Chorus

ENTRY's BELOW.

i can't seem to access my blog. don't know if it's a good or bad thing.

anyway today was pretty fun! after chinese in school, xianny and tab came over to changed and we made our way to pretti's house. and omg, she served us lots and LOTS of food. =) ya-dah. watched basketball matches, caused of step's influence. =)

hmm, and more food. and we played badminton! which i sucked at of course.

then we had the caramel pudding thing, and then ailin suddenly came out with a tub of ice cream which was ~heavenly.

lol, inside joke. =)

hmm, when we and tab realised we were late, so mat offered to take cab with us to joo chiat to take bus or something, but after getting caught in the jam for so long, we decided to stop at eunos mrt to take a train. and we spent five bucks driving a circle, with jams in between. what a waste of money. =(

anyways, we got to church, and i just didn't feel there, you know during worship. but when praise started, everything was alright. i went into church with a heavy heart, and sang through worship with that heavy heart. i thought everything was gonna come out. but hell no, everything just remained inside, like i was cold or some thing. but when praise started. everything felt warm and happy and right.

it was good. and i left church a happy person. who cares about the worries in the world now, when salvation lives in me. lol. anyway my cell is mad la. gareth was screaming all through praise. lol. and supper wasn't supper cause we just talked and didn't ate much. haha. cause apparently the acid created 20 holes in their insides. nvm! inside joke. =)

overall today was cool, except when i did some self-reflecting.

anyway i don't know if accountancy is something i want to get into. cause it's something that my mum says is good for me. not something that i want to do, which in this case is chemical engineering. but obviously i can't just think of what i like, but what i can do in future. well chem engineering is a guy dominated job. and accountancy is like related to money which my mum says that s'pore will need, obviously. but sigh~.

i should just study 1st ah, don't think too much.

one minute i think i've got it all planned out, another minute i think i don't have a clue at all. :(

sigh, sometimes i think i'm too pratical to a fault. like certain things cause i don't wanna give myself a chance cause i think that will affect me this way that way, and that in the future what will happen. all this stuff. i think too much.

i wanna be a humble worshipper.

thats all.

oh, i can't help but add this in.

i went past SMU. and saw the school of accountancy!! hahahaha!! that made my day. goals. are just goals. am i gonna work towards them?

-hope so.

and i went to bugis to get two tops. and i swear i hate bugis. it's so cheena-ah-liah. hmm.

today, was so irritating. well somehow.

anyway! i started my day by trying to get back to sleep cause my stupid neighbour's construction workers was demolishing their kitchen. hence, there was lots of drilling and hammering and bricks falling. -noisy.

so i washed up, and had breakfast with my maid, and we were talking, no shouting cause we can't hear each other. after breakfast, the drills and what not stopped. and i watched desperate housewives! with random hammerings in between. sigh. it just sounds like *bam,bam eeee, bamS*

nevermind. so yea, i rushed out for dental cause i thought i was late. i thought dental was at 11.30 and i left my house at what time? oh yes, 11.15. i called up miss teo. and told her i'll be late. then she said my appointment wasn't today!!! omg. i nearly fainted. so i told her to push to two oclock.

meanwhile, i went to get pris's books. and i took forever to find that complex. i walked from bugis, to waterloo street, to jalan besar, to the library. and it was like here and there and there to here. back. in one big circle. so pissed cause someone didn't pick up the phone to help me out so i called up my sis! she's the other one with the greatest sense of directions.

looked around popular, and they revamp the whole thing and it looks super now. the staff inside were very helpful too! but sadly they didn't have the marianne chong book. went to look some where else and i bought the book for a certain price. and haha!

but i went to this other store and the guy shouted at me can?? wth! he was like it's a new book! what do you expect?! and im like. OH-KAY. i left. and went to the other shop with air-con and the guy was so nice! he was like i help you find and all? see, service! i gladly paid them after that. hahahaha i didn't even bargain. =)

and p.s i can't say which shop i bought it from. although it's pretty obvious cause someone doesn't allow me to.

=)

went for dental. and dr koh fixed my wisdom tooth. it hurted so badly can? and her assistant -june (who looked like my ex-tutor called june too! but she isn't her la) kept making me laugh! so yea.

after dental, i went downstairs to coffee bean to see irene. haha. she gave me some free drink! hahahahaaha. she's so nice. i can't wait for saturday's steamboat!

that's all.

oh yes, when i came home, the drilling was still on. grr.

i wish i can have equal enthusiasm in chinese as i am to blogging. teehee. chinese does not excite me at all! and they're just blocks of words that i don't understand. for chinese, i need lots of luck. sigh.

anyway!

i wanna blog about my dream. i told tab and she can't stop laughing. i don't know why.

i dreamt of some imperial guard who was in the qin dynasty. and that dude passed to me some ancient chinese book. you know those made out of bamboo or something? and yea obviously i can't make out the words. and i can't carry out qin shi wang's order, and i think my head was chopped off.

hmm that was a really weird dream. cause i swear i was in ancient china. they were speaking chinese. wth!

i have to brush up on my languages. my mum laughed at me just now cause i said ''chuan'' retainers. and she was like it's ''dai shang'' retainers. both my mum and dad, made me! the butt of their joke cause i can't speak chinese for nuts. damnit!

i have to love chinese.
i have to love chinese.
i love chinese.
i love chinese.

oh yes, my mum says that SNOW is gonna be the last church activity for this year. except for sundays thats all. hmp. i begged her to let me attend snow.

=)

oh 'jewel in the palace' seems nice. but it's so slow. yawn.

new template! i took it from somewhere and edit until everything fits.

purr-fect-o.

lovelove!

this is gonna be just a photo-entry, i think.

anyway tab came over today after school to do up our SS project! we watched some TV before starting out. and realised we didn't have drawing block, so we went out to buy.

came back and we started on our project. she was doing all the thinking and i was doing the folding and drawing! lol. and we finished up within two hours!

ok before i show the pictures i wanna say that i hate constructions. my neighbour moved out on saturday and the new neighbours are doing the renovations. see when i was sec2. my then neighbour who moved out on saturday did renovations. nvm. then when i was sec4. my other neighbour had renovations done for like 3 effing months. and now i'm hearing all the drilling all over. grrr. i cant wait to move house. like really.

pictures! yes, pictures.


this is tab doing our project. lol.



we started with this.



and i made this box! it's for the die.

tada! =) it's painted.




the finished product! =)

sigh, i took almost forever to get this entry done. i'm such a noob at this photo thing.

and i super, triple, loathe renovations. the noise, drills, hammering is killing me. grr.

i want to make a new template. =) but i don't have the time and enough patience. *sighh.

i wanted to post the lyrics of shan hu hai. but then it occurred to me that it's chinese/han yu pin yin. so i see no point in that. lol.

anyways i slept at 4am yesterday/today. and was up at 8.45 rushed through my chinese and english homework. and watched lizzie mcguire and that's so raven. lol.

and then my tutor came, well she's late. for ten minutes and tuition dragged on for another 20 mins. when i'm suppose to end tuition on time so that i've got time to prepare and leave for English tuition on time. damn. she's so slow sometimes. nvm. anyways i made her teach me how to write proper ''bao zhang du hou gan'' cause i've been failing miserably. and my chinese is so... sigh. lets not go into chinese. i've given up on chinese.

lol. today my dad fetched me home from tuition and then i told him i don't wanna go to australia. cause i like good ol' singapore! haha! and he's so nice he respected my decisions and all. but i told him if i do badly for my o's then i'll go overseas lor.

and he was speaking to me in chinese and i was replying in english. lol.

i was looking through my prelim math papers for mr K and like i scored a pathetic 26/80 for the VS paper. wth. nvm!! this is just march. i'll pass with flying colours when may comes. -hopefully.

hmmm, i can't wait for SNOW. it's speedlight night of worship. lol. today after dinner i was running round the house just singing that salvation song. lol. i dont know, the thought of snow makes me even more excited. and im gonna bring a friend! =) *pats self*

ok nvm! i've been so lame nowdays. and my emotions have been oscillating so much that i can feel so happy one moment and feel so so sad the next. and then feel ever so happy after that. as if my endorphins are released as and when they want to.

i'll post an email i got from ben. i liked it. =)
maybe you've got it. but no harm reading it.

Something interesting I found in my mailbox. Thought I'd forward it
for food for thought. Good story anyhow.



This has a thought provoking message no matter how you believe.
Does evil exist?

The university professor challenged his students with this
question. Did God create everything that exists?
A student bravely replied yes, he did!"
"God created everything?" The professor asked.
"Yes, sir," the student replied.

The professor answered, "If God created everything, then God
created evil since evil exists, and according to the principal that
our works define who we are then God is evil."
The student became quiet before such an answer.


The professor was quite pleased with himself and boasted to the
students that he had proven once more that the Christian faith was
a myth.


Another student raised his hand and said, "Can I ask you a question
professor?" "Of course", replied the professor. The student stood
up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?"


"What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never
been cold?" The students snickered at the young man's question.


The young man replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist. According
to the laws of physics, what we consider cold is in reality the
absence of heat. Everybody and every object is susceptible to study
when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or
matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (- 460 degrees F) is
the total absence of heat; all matter becomes inert and incapable
of reaction at that temperature. Cold does not exist. We have
created this word to describe how we feel if we have too little
heat.


The student continued. "Professor, does darkness exist?"


The professor responded, "Of course it does".


The student replied, "Once again you are wrong sir, darkness does
not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light.
Light we can study, but not darkness. In fact we can use Newton's
prism to break white light into many colors and study the various
wavelengths of each color. You cannot measure darkness. A simple
Ray of light can break into a world of darkness and illuminate it.
How can you know how dark a certain space is? You measure the
amount of light present. Isn't this correct? Darkness is a term
used by man to describe what happens when there is no light
present."

Finally the young man asked the professor. "Sir, does evil exist?"
Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course as I have
already said. We see it every day. It is in the daily example of
Man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and
violence everywhere in the world. "These manifestations are nothing
else but evil."
To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least
it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God.
It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to
describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is not
like faith, or love, that exist just as does light and heat. Evil
is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love
present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is
no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light."
The professor sat down.
The young mans name --- Albert Einstein

tagged-- you're it! =)

the more i think about it, the worst it gets, i've talked to 3 people about it. and they're really nice about it. thanks xiannykong!

it's eating into me like nobody's business. this holidays isn't doing much good. i get too much time on my hands and my thoughts wander. tsk tsk.

can't believe it. im so dense sometimes. and i just don't think enough. damnit.

stop it pamela, stop it.

i like this song. =)
-entry's below.

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again

Hey Mom
Since we're talking
What was it like when you were young
Has the world changed
Or is it still the same
A man can kill and still be the sweetest thing

GOSH.

i should start to act seventeen/sixteen. or maybe i should just stick to being a happy person. afterall, you live only once. =)

or maybe i should stop speaking crudely. LOL.

im feeling happy today! i think it's cause of SSSS, it went really well and i am really proud of my division! haha. and our sandwich was disgusting but it tasted really well. and trust me, it's not just me who thinks this way.
we had, nutella, thousand island, tomato, salad, tuna, lettuce, ham and lots of other things. haha! it looked disgusting though, but it tasted great. =))

so anyway we had a really great p&w. and we sang majesty. i super love that song. and after p&w me and gareth went to the video room to do the slides for ben and nazreth's 'talkshow' and you can hear all the sounds like 'ooo, wahhh' coming from some speedlighters when they saw nazreth's maple score or something.

anyway im feeling lazy to blog about that. but i feel so happy now!!! omgsh.
cause 1stly, i helped kong to do her blogger thing.
2ndly. i've got shanhuhai! that jay chou song! thanks by!!!!
3rdly. today went better than expected. =) God is the greatest.

anyways, im feeling so happy that im just blabbering on about everything. hahahahaha. so forgive me.

happyday!~
the simplest things in life can make you the happiest person!

oh yes. of late i've been sleeping at 9pm. haha. well not actually i'll just sit on my bed and stare, and start thinking. and of course random thoughts just come in. and i find that i take things for granted. well certain things. i've been looking at that certain something and i think that maybe, i'm just plain mean. if i am given a second chance, i'll just probably make full use of that chance. cause time changes almost everything.

and i don't think that certain someone is reading this, but who knows, he/she might, and yea. it'll be nice.

=))

happiness.

today was the meet-the-parents session. it didn't go as bad as i anticipated. cause miss wong turned everything right. for example.

miss wong: mrs chew! i think pamela's really stressed, too much stress will cause her to do badly.
my mum: stress? it's good!
miss wong: *shock expression*

another thing, about the mrs lim issue.

miss wong: i think pamela loves math that she'll do it even in any other class! when her math teacher is in the 2nd chapter, she'll go on to do the 4th chapter. *faces me* pamela, even if you love math, you have to prioritise. or else you'll do well in one subject and not the others.
my mum: yea, you have to plan! but at least your math is good now. ... look at your chinese!!

*lets not go into the chinese part.

*fyi. i do not like math, i suck it that subject terribly! i'll rather love and hug chemistry anyday! but oh yes. funny funny i got a rude shock when i saw my results slip.

i failed science! like 6/100 rank 37/37 grade f9.
i nearly screamed. so i was like miss wong? what nonsense is this? i got A1 for science you know? cause my mum was like. ''i thought your science pass? why get this score?? SIX upon hundred??''

but in the end, it was some typo error, so yea.
gosh. but miss wong was really nice about everything. haha!
and my dad! although he didn't say much but i can tell that he was really pissed with my results.

anyway, that aside, i told my mum about my marks yesterday, and she told me that i'm not allowed to go out with my friends anymore. except on sundays when i've got church. sheesh.


my pimples are all popping out again! terrible.

*

next week is the hols, but it doesn't feel like one, cause we're to go to school still. sigh. but it's better than nothing anyway.

saw the cut off point for business (accounting and finance) in TP. it's like 13. and miss wong said that if i am to go to SP (which is better) the cut off point is 11. and in order to get into SMU (where every student found a job after graduating) i have to get A* for every single assignment, modules and tests. sighh.

competition is so stiff.

*

tomorrow is salvation sunday! although my group is planning, but so many people arent doing anything. GOSH. it's frustrating when a certain someone, keeps asking me to message everyone to tell them to do something when he/she doesn't have to pay his/her bill. i mean the bottom line is that i've bombed my bill and im paying for the damn shits.

when he/she can ask someone else to do it, but just because he/she doesn't like her attitude he /she doesn't want to ask her to help him/her. wtf lor.

nvm, i'll just forget this entire stupid retarded issue then. but gosh...

.. thats all, if i continue typing, everything will just come out.

ohyea, mrs ester ng fetched yin and me to school yesterday, so we bought chocs for her. LOL.
thats all.

what is fair in this world anyway?

thats why friends are for, to pick you up when you're down.

omg, i love grace!! <3s.
whatever to this saturday's PTM. it's over already, i'll just strive and do my best then. no point crying over spilt milk.

i'll go do my best, and everything will fall into place.
seek for answers and they'll come.

yay.
=)

i asked, it was given.
i asked God to show me something, something to make me want to do something for myself. and he sent Grace with some message to spur me on again.
heaven-sent. now i know what that really means.

pray, and everything will be alright. <3

ugh.

miss wong wants to see my parents. wth!!

damnit. i 'll bet with my life that she'll tell them about me doing karib's work during mrs lim's class.

and i didn't even intend to show them my report book considering the fact that i failed three subjects. and one of them includes chinese.

shit. and all my hopes for going out during the hols will be dashed. i can so see that coming. and strings of shouting that sounds like '' you drop home ec and your score's still like that, you see? play play play, i won't let you go out.'' or something like ''what happened to you? don't think that your n levels is good so you slack, no going out anymore.'' wtf.

WTF!
WTF!

omg, im dreading saturday. ugh.

*

anyway if you're wondering what the heck im doing online since it's thursday. well firstly cause, i went to school, on an empty stomach cause i was rushing! and ya-dah.
we had PE after that, and we ran round the canal twice, and i was like running, and stopping and running and stopping again and again. cause my hands didn't felt like hands and my legs felt as if they were like dangling away, i don't know how. but i just can't feel them.

so yea, went back, and since i didn't have a bottle, i just sat down and i saw white stuffs like flashing before me. -as if im gonna die. LOOL jk- so anyway! i dunno my head so spinning. and pris told me it's NORMAL CAN! wth! so since i thought it was normal i waited for it to go away. but it didn't! my headache got worst. and i started crying. wth! out of the blue. i started crying.

ugh. nevermind. so anyway i tried playing that ball thing with fengxian. and omg, i just can't hit a damn ball. haha, so i screwed it up. and rest. got back to class, and i thought a pie would add some suger into my system and make me feel better. but hell no. i felt so pale. lol. i don't know how to feel pale, but pale seems right.

so anyway, i went home! and once i left school i felt so much better! and my brother was like 'life starts after school.' hahaha.

we went home and then, i tried doing sudoku. and my brother said he can do sudoku without erasing. so i was like alright luh. i gave him the pen. and LOL. he finished it in no time. and with a pen. and his answers were like so right. stupid. we were watching some of jay chou's MTVs whilst doing sudoku. and his MTVs are really good.

after that, was watching my parents are aliens and now im here.
sigh. and fx messaged me about the parent-teacher-meeting thing. damn. im so dreading it.

*

that aside. my mum told my brother yesterday that if he is going to australia to study, she will make me go along. to do none other than accounts. gosh. not that i don't mind the accounts thing. but i want to study in singapore! i mean i don't mind doing uni some where else. but at least i wanna try doing poly. or JC which is unlikely.

nevermind. im so screwed this week already. if i fail my o levels i can't go anywhere. so why bother planning. just study and study and study. so my mum will have nothing to say about my grades.

gosh. she can even complain about my n level grades. so even if i get straight As for o levels. she'll probably complain why i didn't top the school or what not.

*

yesterday during kribbles tuition, i swear, i felt horribly dumb. i was stuck at 1(b) for like an hour? while everyone just went on to qns 3 or something. gosh. i have to do math. and more math.

ahhhh screw it all.

I keep trying to find my way
and all I know is I'm lost without you
I keep trying to face the day
I'm lost without you

i sound as if i'm lovelorn. but im not. just like the song. =)

im craving for ICE CREAM.
my template makes me drool.
sigh, chocolate mint. any brand is fine. i want something cold. like, ice cream, or ice-kachang.
=)
ICE CREAM ANYONE? <3

im debating whether to get contacts or not. cause firstly i've got a HUGE phobia of sticking my finger into my eyes. but many people said that i should start deciding wearing contacts.
sigh... im clueless.

It's always times like these
When I think of you
And I wonder
If you ever
Think of me

'Cause everything's so wrong
And I don't belong
Living in your
Precious memories

*

you want to know how social suicide actually feels like? well for starters it feels like shit.

*

i feel like such a retarded humiliated freak.

GOSH. you should've seen, the presentation and all that jazz. i was shivering! i was so jittery! damnit. i can't believe it. and i shiver ever so vigorously. my hands, the paper, my feet. everything was shaking. my mind? it was a huge blank. wtf. to think i was even thinking of joining drama light. i guess i can forget it already.

its just a damn presentation to the kcians who will and never will listen to those kind of shit head talks anyway.

ok, whatever.

-----

anyway i've got to go down to church later cause of super submarine salvation sunday! it's this sunday and each cell is going to make like a really nice and big interesting sandwich. *beams*

and yea, my division is in charge. but thats ok.

anyway!

details are.

venue : Lighthouse Evangelism Tampines =)
time : 11- 3 pm i guess

if you're interested do msg me or email me to let me know alright??

so yes, back to the sandwich, there will be a poll held after speed light, and all new comers will get to vote their favorite sandwich.

and your cell will be able to savour that sandwich when all votes are settled. =)

ooo. *drool people, drool.*

so yea, and i realised i've not done my zuo wen. and im going to church. haha, nvm. i'll stay up again. it's becoming a habit, to stay up late to do what? oh yes, homework.

see, thats where time management comes in, and i don't seem to practice it cause i just want to blog and blog and blog for this useless blog about my monotonous life. of which no one ever reads it cause everytime i check the tags? it's a big blank.

lol.

i know, i sound so needy. which im not. =|


i can't wait for the march holidays! i feel excited just thinking about it.

and oh yes, i think im going to skip odac this week -again (for the third time)- just to go sandwich shopping with tabitha, gareth and nazreth. LOL. sandwich shopping.

thats all. *yawn.*

GODBLESS! =))

If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass us by
'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you...

i've deleted off my private blog. no matter how hard your password, how complicated your web, or even how anonymous you seem online, the internet is so and will always be unsafe.

so yea. deleted! nothing is protected, forever. in this world.

presentation on monday&tuesday! *shudder*
COLDFEET.

no worries, be happy! =)
i had buffet today, i think that's why i'm happy. food helps to release the hormone endorphins.

>.<
i think i'm a bit looney.

took this photo when i was waiting for bus 142. to go home from mr tan. =) i like the sun.
btw that's SAJC. haha. like the school's huge can?

anyways today was so fruitful!

i did quite a bit of homework and everything.

omg. know what? i realise that today, i was having chem tuition and i don't have my text book with me!!! =(

like wth. that happened like for the fourth time this year already. the first few times was for chinese tuition.

hahah.

anyways, that small 2 year old girl got murdered. after being missing for two days.

it sucks you know. she's just a two year old kid. wth. inhumane freaks.

whats up with all these murders anyway? like three for this year? and it's just march only? *shiver.*

what if i die? sigh.. to hell with all the murders. Singapore ain't safe anymore.

=(

anyway went for a buffet treat today. so before the dinner. my sis and i went round paragon. and out of curiosity we went to the roof level. and surprise surprise. it was a very nice sweet smelling spa! =) damn expensive though. only suitable for tai-tais. *dreams*


anyway that's part of the spa thing. it's kinda blur cause i took it with my phone. and i've got shaky hands. sighh.

the amount of faith you give,
the amount you'll receive.

got that today in my sms. found it really interesting. and meaningful. btw it's not word for word cause i accidentally deleted it.

thats all. lovelove!
can't wait for sunday.
i have to talk softer. i have to talk softer.

hold me in your arms, never let me go... =)

READ THIS. haha. i'm cool with lim anyway. just that she's a tab bit. whiney. and that makes my hair stand. other than that. =) yay. yin.

ugh.

4 people called me today. (since i didn't go to school.)

and all four said the same thing. the thing about miss wong scolding the class cause of what mrs lim said. and wtf. whose fault is it? oh, it's mine?! all mine. i started it. i always never fail to pull the class down cause i'm doing somebody elses work in her class.

and i know it's my fault. and i can only blame myself. sheesh. wtf. scold me can already what, it's damn irritating when the entre 5/2 gets pulled down too. i'll feel worse. maybe that's her purpose.

anyway i can forsee some trashing tomorrow. sighh. and yes, im going to school. cause of my effing tys. sigh.

and there's 3 periods of math tomorrow. maybe i'll give her class a shot. no harm anyway.

just hope that the bad blood between us will just, subside.

*rolls eyes*. what an entry.

thats all.

and if you think im not feeling any sort of remorse, think again. i do feel remorseful.

i just don't plan to show it.

GRR. i think im pmsing.

What about the world today
What about the place that we call home
We've never been so many
And we've never been...
So Alone

yesterday was so tiring.

YAWN.

that i deliberately took the day off, it started out at 6.30am when i felt so tired i coulden't get up. so i told myself to stay home.

lied to my mum that i got the headache. sheesh. she shouted at me for staying at home. and then shouted at my maid for not waking me up.

after a maelstorm of confusion. my mum finally decided that i've got the fever. HAHA. so she said that i should go to the doctor.

and the doctor found out that i've got throat infection. omg.

so he gave me two days worth of MC.

LOL. so now im debating whether to go to school or not (tomorrow). i know it's bad to skip school this way. but everything is taking a toll on me, i can barely keep awake.

let's see it's 1.38pm now and what have i done for whole day?

i did my English, went to the docs, did my bio. and stared at nutrition in plants for two hours now, and i still don't get it. i really can't get bio.

however good my tutor is. i just can't seem to get bio. damnit.

it's better then before. but i'm still oblivious to all the plants, digestion and stuff. omg.

thats why i prefer chemistry. it has this pattern that is so easy to follow. haha! why am i blogging about chem/bio?

sigh. i'll have lunch now.

should i got school tomorrow? i'll definitely not go for odac tomorrow though.

but my TYS and stuff is all in school. and i need it for tuition on saturday. who can help me take it? unless i attend school, but...

and oh, i failed chinese. sigh, what on earth is happening to me?
im so screwed.

school is so straining. i anticipate the march hols. don't you?

sigh.


i think im really sick now, considering the state of my coughs.